X

In a random rush 5 minutes after I sat down, someone patted my shoulder and pulled me off my bus seat so that some old woman could stay in it. And I just went along without thinking. Probably because I need to grow a pair, because the bitch who did this sat her 40 cm tall baby on the seat next to her like she couldn’t just hold him in her arms to free a seat. I hate small children and the elderly, and I always did. I do realize I was small and I will eventually grow old, but  when I was small I wasn’t a spazzy noisy spoiled piece of shit, and I won’t smell like shit and litter the streets walking slowly and getting in everyone’s way when I’ll be old. I need to grow some balls and actually say what I think.

‘Life’s too short to complicate’? No, it isn’t. To say something like that you have to have a weak notion of time, because life is the longest thing you get to actually do. Just saying, I know it’s a metaphor. But it’s not like because I don’t go out as much I don’t live my life. The only case in which you aren’t living is when you’re not. I mean being dead, of course. I do like getting drunk and dancing and all that crap, just not every Friday night. I just like a quiet evening, a beer, a talk, the good stuff.

‘A gentleman will walk but never run’. Some people are the right people at the wrong time, some the wrong people at the right time. Sometimes I feel like the wrong person at the wrong time. If I were to chose a place to be born, as stereotypical as it is,  I’d chose either Victorian England or 70’s England. I know the conditions aren’t as great, but I just like those cultural ages. I’d probably change my ideas if I’d have actually lived in those times, but then again it’s the human condition: always displeased with the things you have. If it’s winter it’s too cold, if it’s summer, too hot. If you’re rich you’re unhappy, if you’re poor you’re struggling to survive. I’ve talked about this before, but extremes are always bad. Also depriving yourself of something and giving it back after a while brings happiness. We should alternate our lifestyles to be happier, maybe. Maybe. Mayb’.